Why I Still Let My Kids Sleep in My Bed—Even Though Everyone Says I Shouldn’t
Co-sleeping isn’t the parenting disaster Western critics claim. Nearly half of American families do it, and globally, it’s totally normal – like 84% of Chinese families share beds. Research shows no negative effects on kids’ development. Instead, it provides comfort, eases nighttime parenting, and strengthens family bonds. Parents are ditching the guilt and embracing what works. Because sometimes the “wrong” choice is exactly right. There’s more to this story than judgmental neighbors realize.
When did parents’ beds become the default landing zone for restless kids? Despite the endless unsolicited advice about why co-sleeping is “wrong,” the reality is that nearly half of all families have kids climbing into their beds at some point. And guess what? It’s completely normal across most of the world.
Despite all the finger-wagging, co-sleeping isn’t some modern parenting fail – it’s how families have managed bedtime for generations.
Let’s face it – Western societies love to act scandalized by co-sleeping, while roughly 84% of Chinese preschoolers snooze with their parents without anyone batting an eye. The practice is especially common in rural areas and among families with limited space. Sometimes a king-sized bed isn’t a luxury – it’s a necessity. Recent surveys show that 45 percent of families report co-sleeping at least some of the time in the United States.
The benefits are pretty clear. Kids, particularly those dealing with anxiety or fears, find genuine comfort and security sleeping near their parents. During times of stress or illness, that closeness can be essential. Research consistently shows that extended co-sleeping has no detrimental effects on children’s behavioral development. Sure, some might call it “enabling,” but most cultures view it as building family bonds. Who knew that unconscious drooling could bring people closer together?
Critics love to point out sleep disruption risks, but they conveniently ignore how co-sleeping is the norm in countless societies. Denmark, hardly a backward nation, reports about 39% of families share sleep space. The practice gradually decreases as children mature, but that shift happens naturally in most cases. Just like the Huang family in Fresh Off the Boat, many immigrant families adapt their cultural practices to their new environment.
The truth is, parents make this choice for numerous practical reasons. Maybe it’s easier for nighttime nursing, or perhaps they’re tired of the 2 AM marathon walks back to a child’s bedroom. Some families get creative with arrangements – bigger beds, floor mattresses, or musical-beds-style rotations that would impress a choreographer.
Yes, there are safety considerations, especially for infants. Smart parents skip the fluffy bedding and guarantee adequate space. But the cultural hysteria around co-sleeping in Western societies seems more about rigid social expectations than actual problems. For many families worldwide, it’s just another night’s sleep – complete with tiny feet in their faces and the occasional sleeptalking concert.
